Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Rules for drinking at my bar

Here are just two...I think this may be an ongoing series of posts.

1. If it's 20 degrees outside and almost midnight, don't fucking order a margarita. This isn't Key West, you don't kick ass, and you look like a fucking fool. Same goes for drinking bloody marys after 5pm. Drink these drinks at appropriate times. Margaritas? Not after sundown (I will allow the Rio to be the exception to this rule). Bloodys? Never after happy hour (unless you are SUPER hurting). That's my piece about that.

2. Just because you heard a friend of mine call me by name, doesn't mean you get to yell 'Matty!' when you need a drink. It's rude. If we don't know each other, cool, I have no problem introducing myself (and then you can join in that amazing sing song chorus of 'Matty Matty!' that takes place every night) but until then, don't call me anything at all.

Am I being snotty? Fuck yeah! Sitting at my bar rules, I am very generous and amiable, I give out a million cigarettes and shots. So just be cool and stick to the rules.

Am I being conceited? Fuck yeah!


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